Forever Daisy

Dear Daisy,

Finally i had the nerve to do something. Although it's pretty small but it still need a lot courage to do such a thing. I'm not going to tell you what since i'll be hurting my pride if i do so. Me and my freaking pride. That is all i care about for now. I'm striving to be happy and restoring all the forgotten memories. I need to come back to where i was suppose to go and stop all the hate and vengeance. Now where am i heading with this topic? I better stop there.

Forever Daisy

Dear Daisy,

Seriously, i'm going nuts or insane or just crazy. You see, i'm breaking out of my teeny weeny world and like G-Dragon says when you overworked yourself and you can't seem to stop where people might call it insanity or something like that. I'm just interpreting what he meant. That is what i thought. I seem to break out of my comfort zone and go all the way through. And sugar,honey,ice,tea it's freaking insane here. I had headaches days ago and the only thing that i could write out are my poems and such. I was unable to update anything on my blog nor just go anywhere. I was stressful, miserable and just feeling exhausted. But then with only a bit of hint, help and info it made me alive. For the past few days i'm at my wit ends and now i have got the info and know what i'm searching for, things have come back to live. Here i am, holding onto hope which i'm about to achieve and make it come true. You guys probably don't know what i'm talking about but this whole thing nearly killed me in the end of the day. I'll become bald the next time you see me. Thank goodness i'm wearing hijab. Goodness me, i just deducted my own market. Unbelievable. Well, blast it.

Forever Daisy

Dear Daisy,

Things just keep on getting complicated. Shouting won't help not even singing. Although i do feel like singing, i can't. It's night and i have to consider about other people also. I am so dead. So dead. This brain of mine is clogging lately. Pfft. Seriously, why am i using that word? Of all the word and that's all i could think of? I got to have my head check. Blast it. Anyway, don't know where to start again. Let's just follow my own rhythm.

Forever Daisy

Dear Daisy,

No matter how i open the a new leaf and start all over, i still deal with the same matter. The only difference is how will i end it this time. This is killing me. It's like i've been dead and brought back to live again. I'm stuck in the middle and been doing calculation in my head. Not only that, i've been trying to think of a backup plan. This is so irritating. Banging my head on the table won't help. I'm so dizzy. I probably need a sleep but then i'm too dizzy. I'll write another post once i get to figure all this stuff up. Until Daisy comes. :)

Forever Daisy

Dear Daisy,

I change the title. Brand new day. I mean post. But it's the same feeling just a change of title since i have reached my goal. I really can't believe that i have reached 200 posts. It's worth it. Makes me feel better. Writing to Daisy and to the people that i care about. If it's only by reading this can make people see the way i see, then what i'm doing is all worth it. But i don't force people to see it the same way. Just correct me if you think i'm wrong. I am not perfect to begin with. I have said this countless times. If you did try to correct me and i'm mad at your critiques, bear with it cause it's just a normal reaction from someone who thinks highly of her pride and her own life. In times, i will see the wrong in it. (^_^)/

Letter to Daisy 200th

Dear Daisy,

Let's have a blast!!! Party baby. It's my 200th post. 

Letter to Daisy

Dear Daisy,

Just a couple of hours to go before i close my Facebook account. The funny thing is, somewhere deep inside my heart i felt a teeny weeny of lonely when i count the hours. It's a bit scary. But i have decided that i will shut it down. I hope i will never open it again. That would be like my biggest regret if i open it again. You could say i'm running away but i would insist that i was only recovering. But i know for sure that this won't solve anything. The way i see it, this is much easier than the other one. I finally let go of the bothersome burden whenever i'm online and logging into Facebook. There's a person that i need answers from, a person to ask forgiveness from, a person who brought up the wounded memories, a person who's a friend but unable to talk to, a person who rejects me, a person who keep to themselves, my old memories and mostly part of my life. I have decided to leave it all behind. Not that i'm leaving the world. Just leaving the land of Facebook. That is all.

Letter to Daisy

Dear Daisy,

I need to hurry. My other blog has nearly reached to the point that i need a celebration. That took a while. It seems like my brain and inspiration works better when i'm living in misery or felt a teeny weeny of it. Seriously, i can't believe i need to be miserable to be able to come up with something that might touch people's heart. Well if i didn't have those, i would talking about the trees and the world. I kept thinking of making a love poem but i really can't make one. It always ends with a heart throbbing rhythm. So much for my love stories.

Letter to Daisy

Dear Daisy,

I was going to write and update you sooner but my mind is like a switch sometimes. I seldom forgot what i want to share in the middle of typing bits of my life down. Probably because i'm used to delete whatever it is that is unnecessary or keep it at certain place in my heart and locked it down fearing that it would easily slips of when i'm too obsessed or fall into the lust that i have hidden somewhere within me. Well, everyone must have one. Something that will overpowered them thinking that it's their strength but in fact that very own will bring them down if they keep holding onto it. Life is something where we learn to achieve and let go. Having imbalance and imperfection. That is the whole point. I realize that now. I kept thinking why nothing can ever be perfect. Now i get it. After so many trials and errors that i made, the blaming and the hurting, i've finally see the conclusion. But as usual, every answers that i found seems to be taking bits of everything. I'm fine with it now. Unless the 'antibiotics' that i took finally worn off than maybe i'll have to fight twice as hard while preparing for my next 'drug'.