I have to apologize to you first Daisy. This will be an unpleasant post. I don't want to do this but i'm too angry to go out of the room. I'm locking myself in so i don't have to see my sister's face. I don't care if you said i'm a bad sister or whatsoever. I know she bad mouth me a lot of time in her blog or whenever she's with her boyfriend. I don't care anymore. They already think so lowly of me. I just don't care. No matter if i say don't judge the book by its cover, they already had that in their head. This really hurt me and i believe i have done nothing but be patience for the sake of my parent. Now, i don't think i'll be able to do any of that. I'll be ignoring them. I don't care anymore. I have a pride, i have a life, i have my honor also. I want them to respect me even though i'm younger but what gives them the right to look down on me??? I know i'm jobless and the highest education that i have is only Diploma and it doesn't have anything to do with science. Well, i'm sorry for being stupid and such. I'm too lazy to study for the sake of finding a job. I don't find the enjoyment there. That is my point of view. I want to learn something fun without giving the path that i chose a lot of burden in the future. Yes, i know i'll be wasting our parent's money but you guys have job, got paid and so on but all you guys could think of getting married as soon as possible. What are you??? Too eager too get out of the family matters. Not even one penny i receive from you, willingly. Not even one!!! And here you think you have given enough. Enough of what??? Enough trouble??? Wake up and smell the roses!!!
I was going to be silent about it but you guys hurt me more than i can endure. You think i'm holding a grudge??? Think again. You dare to tempt me into this unpleasant side of mine then you better beware what i'm going to do to you. You'll take no respect from me nor will i think of you as my sister anymore. Go ahead and get married. You guys were better out from this house. Begging mom to hear your pain and such. Why don't you hear her pain? For years she endures everything that we done and this is how you treat her and treat dad. Useless sister. Hopeless. I'll call you whatever i want. I just don't care anymore. To hell with your boyfriend/husband!!! I don't give a damn about it anymore. I'll take care of mom and dad and our lil sis from now on. You guys get the hell out of this house. I'm thankful i'm not a genius or a smart one. Want to know why??? Smart people tend to make the stupidest mistake of their life and only regret when it's too late. Yes, i'm thankful for that. It doesn't hurt to apologize when it is your mistake. Your pride won't hurt and so on. Idiot. Baka. I'm not going to be the sweet sister anymore. You won't gain any respect from me. No point having a degree or successful but stupid. I DON'T GIVE A DAMN ABOUT IT ANYMORE!!! SICK AND TIRED OF YOUR STUPIDITY, YOUR SELFISHNESS AND YOUR LIFE.
Daisy, i know i spill out something that are not suppose to be share but i really can't help it. Here i am, fighting, struggling to keep the family together. But it's no use. They forgot everything. Almost everything. If i were so cruel, i'll manipulate and twisted every story so they will live a terrible life but i'm not that person. No matter how i curse them and angry towards them for making me like a real house maid, they are still my sister. I don't care if i'm the only one who sees them like that because i'm D.Ct Sal. I won't give up so easily. Yes, it hurt. Yes, i'm angry. Yes, i do feel like giving up. But for the sake of the family i love and cherish i just keep going forward. There will be a time where i lose my temper. I know there will be but i still care for them no matter stupid they are. I don't fight back because i'm too angry, too tired to do so. Don't make me fight and don't make me do what i don't want to do. Daisy, someday if i'm gone i really wonder what will happen to mom and dad. That is what keeping me at home. Sorry Daisy, if you have to see this side of mine. At times like this i feel like crying because i'm too angry keeping it inside my heart. Lend me your shoulder Daisy. You're all i have. You're all i have. Until then Daisy.
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