Be My Daisy

Dear Daisy,

Be My Daisy

Dear Daisy,

Salam Aidiladha to all Muslims. Yes, it's Aidiladha. We're suppose to have an open house but it turns out to be a failure. Could it be coming from me? The cake that i make, is pretty sweet and i don't like it at all. In fact, i never like sweet stuff at all. Probably it's our way of living. I'm used to drink less sugar in my tea and that includes the cake. Which is probably the reason why i never really like buy cake from bakery. But anyway, today i didn't invite a lot of people and you can say that none of my friends actually know that i make open house. Except for one. I don't have that many friends and this could be the most depressing thins of all. I locked myself away due to a certain things that happen in the past which made me lose half of my friends. I'll probably blame myself in this.

Be My Daisy

Dear Daisy,

Aye, its a long hiatus indeed. But don't think i did it on purpose. There are circumstances happen here and there. I have to fight for months just to be online without the thoughts of them making me feel like i'm a beggar. My own siblings did this. I feel like i want to blame them but my nature always find my own fault. So, in the end i should just say it's my fault. What i have been doing? Besides declaring war against my family for the past few months, i have been planning. Planning my sweet escape as my friend would call it. I might have to stick with the name. My sweet escape. 

Be My Daisy

Dear Daisy,

Yes, it has been a while since my last incident. Some things happen when you least expected and it gives you either fear or the happiest moment in your life. Well for me, after all that i happen to be in a state of trauma with every little sound that i can hear. But most probably the sound of clinking between steels happen to freak me out or even strangers passing by in front of my parent's house. I happen to be shaking. Still i don't want this fear to control me to the point it drives me insane. So i have been struggling to stop myself from shivering and all that. And that is probably the reason why i have been in a long hiatus. Not that i never thought of anyone who's reading this but i just don't want to be trapped in the same time again. Every night i would still remember how the whole thing happen. As if it was just yesterday and that's why i can't help but fight it by myself. It does feel terrible being alone in that state. So far, no one had hugged me or whatsoever. Thus, my conclusion stays the same. I need to get married either way. 

Be My Daisy

Dear Daisy,

There has been another attempted robbery again at my sister's house!!!!

Be My Daisy

Dear Daisy,

I should have told you but i didn't. I should have told you on the spot but i didn't do anything. I was grateful that the incident didn't haunt me to my dreams and becomes my greatest nightmare but i was not grateful when people keep on putting stories that are horrible than what i just encountered few days ago. Daisy, on 7th of May at 8 am my sister's house nearly got robbed!!!

Be My Daisy

Dear Daisy,

I'm being like this again. Rejecting everyone when i wanted LOVE. I contradict myself with action and words. How could i tell people that i do too want to get married and i too want to have a happy ending. I can't and i just don't know how. Making that big decision in my life is like lying to the whole world. I'm rejecting everyone now. I don't know how to proceed anymore Daisy. Somehow i feel that love just vanish from my heart. I don't know how to retrieve it back. Was i hurt that badly to the point i didn't realize that it's gone? Or to the point it's there but i just could not see it somehow? Last time it was all about the drowning in tears and now just empty. I dream too much and hope too much right? Too much novel thats been clouding my head and i forgot to stay on the ground. Is it too late now Daisy? Somehow, it does feel a little bit too late. Dear heart o heart of mine. I could never heal you with my own broken shell. Until then my Daisy.